I’m not typically a writer of a Christmas letter. Usually, I wait until January after the rush of the holiday is complete and the grey, North American winter has set in. But this year, I can’t kick the desire to send something out, something that updates friends and family on us.
I’ve had this song, by John Lennon, floating around my head,
So this is Christmas
And what have you done?
Another year over
And a new one just begun
And so this is Christmas
I hope you have fun
The near and the dear one
The old and the young
A very merry Christmas
And a happy New Year
Let’s hope it’s a good one
Without any fear
So this is Christmas…and what have you done? What HAVE we done? In order to answer that, we need to rewind the tape a bit farther than last Christmas.
October 2016 we left Singapore and moved to Pennsylvania. Brian had accepted a position managing a Gulfstream Jet for Jet Aviation (based in NJ). This was a huge blessing after over a year of Brian looking for an opportunity that would ease his symptoms of chronic fatigue (working in a non air-conditioned hangar at the equator left him absolutely spent). So, we left four years in Singapore and started the process of relocating, resettling, and readjusting to American life. After six weeks in a hotel, in December 2016 we moved into our house and then headed to Michigan to be with family for Christmas. Now, back to the question…what have we done in 2017?
I always feel a bit like a fish out of water when I am in the United States. I’m American, but I’m most comfortable where I actually do not belong (overseas). I met a woman here who said it best,
“My house is my home…not the town or the city…just my house. It’s the place I can be the most me.”
And that’s true for me. So, a good part of the last year has been spent making our house our home. We were blessed with a house that had all the major work done for us and done well. It just needed our touches. Kids have graduated to separate rooms and their individual personalities are showing through. Our guest room has space in the closet and drawers. Our yard has been weeded and a few additions added. We had our first garden this summer and are making plans of how to add to it next summer.
People have asked why we moved here…to northeast Philadelphia. We were looking for a school district that sees and supports kids’ learning differences. This district does just that – learning support is both valued and available. That does not mean it’s handed to you, though. Zach’s teacher fought with me for him last year and we were able to get through a 2 month assessment and evaluation process to prove he’s eligible for support within the year. He works with an Occupational Therapist at school once a week and has a learning support teacher in his classroom who adjusts curriculum, works with him individually and in small groups, and is my point person for any concerns. He’s doing well and our prayers for a friend for him have been answered in a sweet kid in his class. He may not have a passion for bugs like Zach, but he has a gentle spirit and a kind heart.
A meeting last week finalized the process for Emily who has struggled with reading and math to the point of frustration. We are still looking at a few potential diagnoses for her, but at the moment the goal is to gain a level of success in school in order to bolster her confidence. She’s also been able to join an art club at school and comes home each Wednesday proudly showing off her work. I’m relieved to have an Individualized Educational Plan (IEP) for each child in place. Watching our kids struggle academically has been difficult, confusing, frustrating, and eye opening. God created each of our kids and I’m grateful for the unique qualities each has. I’ve learned so much about how their brains work and what helps them succeed. An IEP in no way means I can just sit back and relax, but it gives us the plan to move forward and the legal backing to make specific requests for each child that will aide in their learning.
We’re gradually building relationships with people. Our neighborhood has given us a warm welcome and I’m grateful for kind neighbors. Next door live two teachers with a 5 year old girl and 3 year old boy. It’s fun to see Zach and Emily with their kids. Across the street are several retired couples/singles who have been helpful with things at the drop of a hat. We met a number of families at the community pool this summer and the kids have plenty of school connections within the neighborhood. We’ve attended two block parties (one in the summer and one for Christmas) and it’s amazing to hear the stories of neighbors helping neighbors over the years.
In 2017, Brian’s job had him travel over 100,000 miles; having him gone 60% or more of the time was hard. Single parenting is exhausting. Emily seemed to have the most struggle with Brian’s comings and goings. Where Zach would cry about things he missed in Singapore, Emily would react in anger over little things. Trust me, it wasn’t a pretty picture. I’m grateful for a few family friends in the area who would hear me out when I was frazzled or show up with dinner when I’d had a long week without Brian. We moved so many times over the last seventeen years, but this one was a completely new experience since Brian was out of the day-to-day learning curve. Typically we settle in together – Brian working, I’m sorting out the details, and we compare notes. This time, he was on the opposite side of the globe the bulk of the year. That said, I still have quite a way to go before Pennsylvania feels like home.
Summer flew with plenty of time at the pool and nearby parks, as well as short trips to Texas, Connecticut, western PA, and Georgia. We saw family and friends, relaxed, and enjoyed a slower pace. September arrived with Zach entering 4th grade and Emily entering 2nd grade. I felt like I could finally begin to unwind and settle into life here; like after a year of surviving and barely making it to a tiny bit of space to breathe.
Unfortunately, that was short lived because Brian’s employment ended in October with the sale of the aircraft. My tiny bit of space to breathe slammed shut with that change and six weeks later, I feel like I’m just learning how to breathe again as we wait. Because that’s what a lot of job hunting is…in the midst of networking, cold calling, interviewing, you’re waiting for someone to make a decision. We’re grateful for a contract job here and there for Brian so there’s a bit of income. We hope to stay here in Pennsylvania. We hope a job comes sooner rather than later. We hope and trust. And in a moment, our lives will change again.
And isn’t that what Christmas is about?
Hope.
Trust.
Waiting.
Life changed in a moment.
The Old Testament whispers the hope of the Messiah. The hope of the one who will come and make all things right. But Israel had to wait and there were times where God seemed so distant, so far away, so confusing and unloving. And then, in a moment, God entered earth as a baby and eternity was changed.
So, this is Christmas. I will hope and trust. I will wait. And I will watch for the moment that God will step in and change our current circumstances. And meanwhile, like the shepherds, like Mary and Joseph, like the Wise Men, I will keep on doing the tasks laid in front of me. I will take it one day at a time and try to breathe.
Merry Christmas!
Brian, Jessie, Zachary, and Emily
Bash Journeys 